Transportation

"Transportation" was definitely yesterday's theme. It started out with a really fun adventure. That evening, things got a lot less fun.

I've been trying to avoid using the car more and more, in part because taking Dylan in and out of the car is so disruptive. He will fall asleep right as we reach our destination, and he's too big now to carry around in the "bucket" car seat. So then I have to decide whether the bucket will get lugged out of the car and strapped in the stroller, or whether I will remove Dylan from the car seat, likely waking him, to put him into the Moby.

Dylan LOVES the Moby wrap. When he sees me putting it on, his face lights up. It cracks me up. I don't know if it's because he knows we're going out, or because he just loves being carried in such a snuggly way. I can only carry him so far before my body gives out, but I figure carrying 19 additional pounds can only help with losing the baby weight. And since he's not getting any smaller...

Anyway, I realized that the number 10 bus, which stops not far from my house, also goes right to my Tuesday morning moms group. And if we take the bus, Dylan can ride in the Moby all the way to our destination. So that's just what we did. We took the bus to group, walked to lunch with some of the moms afterward, and then got back on the bus and went home. And since a bus transfer is good for around 5 hours, the whole trip only cost $2. Hooray!



I was feeling pretty cool when we got home. I did some dishes and laundry, Dylan napped in the swing, and I rested for a while. Then Kira called and invited Dylan and I to come visit her and Chris during their dinner break at the Winningstad Theatre downtown. (Chris and Kira are in tech all this week. Chris designed the set for a play that Kira's company is producing. But this means that I'm totally on my own for childcare this week, since they don't get done until after 10pm every night.) So when Dylan woke up, I packed him in the car and we headed downtown.

The heat wasn't coming on in the car. This has been taking longer and longer lately, but now it wasn't working at all. We were most of the way there when I realized that the temperature gauge was starting to climb. I started to completely freak out.

Nothing makes me panic quite like car trouble. It's seriously on an irrational level. I think part of it is that I ran my first car into the ground when I moved to Colorado, and it was really scary dealing with that alone (no parents, no Chris). My dad generously paid to have the engine rebuilt, and then THAT engine gave out on me, too. So I killed a car twice by overheating it. And I have such overwhelming feelings of guilt and shame when that happens, because I don't always do my scheduled maintenance on time. (Ok, I never do it on time.) I think I have some unresolved trauma around this issue, so whenever it starts to happen, my pulse races and I lose my ability to cope.

I managed somehow, despite my emotional breakdown, to find a parking spot almost right away only a few blocks from the theater. I put the baby in the stroller and walked to the theatre. When I got there, I broke down crying on Kira's shoulder almost immediately. She and Chris talked me out of my tree, and Kira watched the baby and helped me find some water to pour in the radiator. I'm sure the people dining at the fancy restaurant must have wondered as I walked by the window, "Is that woman pushing a 5 gallon bucket in a stroller?" Yes, yes she is.

Well, I poured 3 quarts of water in the radiator, and it was okay to drive. I was still a wreck, and our wonderful friend (and lead technician at the Winnie) Jen generously volunteered to drive Chris' truck back to our house so he could drive our car and I could cower in the passenger seat. I seriously was afraid to even look at the temperature gauge while he was driving. Irrational, I'm telling you. We got home fine.

This morning, thanks to AAA, the car went to the mechanic without me. The bad news: they don't know what the problem is for sure, but it's definitely inside the engine. So the only question is whether it will cost $2,000 to fix, or more like $4,000 or more. Jeesh, my stomach hurts.

It's a good thing Dylan and I are so awesome at riding the bus...